Monthly Archives: August 2010

I have a seemingly endless capacity for useless pop culture trivia. My best friend calls me the Human IMDB, and while I’m not sure I’d go that far, there is still a bunch of stupid information in my head. But … Continue reading →

To this day, I can’t resist a good zing, even when it’s only going to result in badness for me.

Then I farted and fell asleep on the floor.

Poor, seven-year-old me. I thought I was being so mature with my calm response to the “no Santa” revelation, but finding out there was no Easter Bunny was too much to bear. (Too much to bunny?) 

Results woefully typical.

I also do this, on a lesser level, with letters and days of the week.

Even when I was five and didn’t know what a gay person was, all I could think was, “I don’t think Rio likes Jem like that.”

I have apparently grown out of being able to understand teenage slang. What the hell does this even mean? They did more than making out? Less? Is “general” a place? I would hate to see what making out “in specific” … Continue reading →